How To Save A Life
by happyday girl
Summary: Songfic based in season 4. After the events of 'Metamorphosis', Dean realises that he has crossed a line with Sam, and tries to make things right. Sam, of course, is less forgiving. Not Wincest. Please R&R.


**This story is set a few days after the episode ' Metamorphosis'. **

Dean looked across at his brother, they had just come back from a testing hunt and Sammy had got hurt, bad.

Blood was oozing out of a bullet wound on his shoulder, the spreading liquid turning his shirt crimson as it made its way down his body, saturating the material.

'let's get that looked at Sammy...it looks pretty bad' said Dean, moving to gently grasp his little brother's arm and move it towards him, but Sam wrenched his body away, turning away from Dean and walking to his bed.

'No. It's fine- I can deal with it' he muttered, sitting down with a hiss of pain, face scrunching in obvious discomfort.

'Sam-'

'I said I can deal with it! What? Can't I even patch myself up, am I too much of a monster to even do that now?' Sam snapped eyes full of undisguised anger.

Dean's stomach dropped. He bitterly regretted what he had said, but he needed Sam to understand, and a scare tactic was the only thing he could think of.

'Sam, I-'he began, but Sam angrily cut across him.

'No Dean...your not sorry, so don't even try to apologise!' he growled, struggling to get his shirt off to start patching himself up. The material snagged on his arm, but as Dean walked forward to help him he jumped up with a growl, and then walked over to his duffel.

He pulled out a pair of scissors, and began to cut the material.

Dean stood, sadness and bitter regret coursing through his veins.

He had lost Sam.

The only person he could ever fully confide in, the only person who actually knew him...was gone.

Now Sam wouldn't even let him patch him up, whereas before he would let him, trusting him more than himself.

He knew he shouldn't have said that to Sammy, Sam thought he was doing the right thing, taking the right action after he had been to hell, but couldn't he see what he was doing this to himself?

Dean watched Sam patch himself up, applying four stitches to the wound, hissing with pain as he did- and Dean felt ever stitch go in, feeling as if Sam was stitching him as well, patching his love and care inside him as he went, trapping it in himself to stop it comi

After Sam had finished he crossed to his bed and got out his laptop, turning it on and settling back on his bed, a permanent scowl, or bitch face as Dean liked to call it, fixed on his face.

'Sam...'Dean sighed, but he didn't finish-he knew Sam wouldn't want to hear it. After he calmed down he would explain-make him understand.

He sat himself down on the small table and looked out the window, wondering how to break the silence.

_Step one you say we need to talk  
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk  
He smiles politely back at you  
You stare politely right on through  
Some sort of window to your right  
As he goes left and you stay right  
Between the lines of fear and blame  
You begin to wonder why you came_

Dean desperately wanted to talk to his brother, knock some sense into him.

What he had seen him doing with Ruby had truly scared him, it just unnerved him to see the bitch have that much control over him, as Sam usually made all the decisions, wouldn't do anything he didn't want to- did he really want to do this?

Castiel had warned him that if Sam didn't stop, the angel's would-Dean had to protect him from that, by any means possible.

Sure, Sammy would get angry with him-but he'd live.

But Sam didn't even want to discuss it with him, and by that alone, Dean knew that their relationship would never be the same. He had crossed a line with his brother, and there was no going back.

_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
somewhere along in the bitterness  
and I would have stayed up with you all night  
had I known how to save a life_

Sam was fighting a losing battle, and it he was spiralling out of control. If he was taking down Demons using him mind, what else was he doing?

Dean had always protected him from everything, no matter what-but if Sam was being secretive and lying to him, how the hell could he help?

Dean didn't even know that Ruby survived before the other night, now it seemed that Sam was up to more than just screwing her.

Was this his fault?

Had he gone wrong somewhere as he was bringing him up?

Had he forgotten to mention some little detail whilst he was growing up, something that would have stopped this from happening?

_Let him know that you know best  
Cause after all you do know best  
Try to slip past his defence  
Without granting innocence  
Lay down a list of what is wrong  
The things you've told him all along  
And pray to God he hears you  
And pray to God he hears you_

'Dean' the single, lightly uttered word jolted Dean out of his thoughts, making him jump a little.

'Yeah?' replied Dean, trying not to sound too eager or relieved that Sam had spoken to him.

'I- I'm not a monster Dean...I thought I was helping' Sam said, a small whine in his voice making him sound twelve again, trying to explain to him why he hadn't gone to school.

Dean sighed a little, and moved to sit on Sam's bed, his brother closing the laptop and sitting up straighter.

'I know Sammy, I know...it's just- I think you're just doing it the wrong way' he said softly, watching Sam for his reaction.

Sam bristled slightly, and then breathed out slowly.

'I don't. This method works better than the colt, Ruby's knife, hell, everything we've ever used to fight demons- it doesn't kill the victim!' Sam said, his voice rose slightly.

Dean tried not to get angry, but it was always hard when Sam was intent on sticking to his argument.

'But Sam-the angels told me to stop you, or they would...isn't that enough to make you stop?

Wont you stop for god?' he asked, the question hanging in the air like a stale smell.

Sam sat, looking at his brother, trying to breathe normally.

He hated to admit it, but Dean had a point...no.

He was saving people. He was helping, couldn't Dean see that?

What was so wrong about using his powers-why was he given them if he couldn't use them?

'You don't understand...' he started, but Dean Cut across him.

'Then help me understand Sammy- I want to understand, but I can't' he said, anger and frustration starting to pour out in his words.

'I CAN'T BECAUSE YOU WON'T HEAR ANY VIEWS APART FROM THE DAMN ANGELS!' he yelled, standing up and facing his brother, anger now freely coursing through him.

'you've never listened to me about this sort of thing- you prefer to just ignore it and hope it goes away- but it never will Dean...this is my life, START BELIEVING IT!' he shouted.

_As he begins to raise his voice  
You lower yours and grant him one last choice  
Drive until you lose the road  
Or break with the ones you've followed  
He will do one of two things  
He will admit to everything  
Or he'll say he's just not the same  
And you'll begin to wonder why you came_

Dean inhaled shakily before sitting back down. He knew that Sam was right, but he just wouldn't face up to what Sam had become.

'I- I can't Sammy...you can change- I'll help you...I'll do anything you want, give you anything you need-'

'uhh- your not listening Dean...I'm doing the right thing, I'll explain it to the angels, to anyone who will listen- I've been saving more people than we save in ages! This is helping, this is the right thing to do!' he said, smiling at his brother, hoping he could make him understand, but all he got back was a concerned and mildly angry stare back.

'You know what- forget it!' he snapped, before grabbing his coat and storming out the door.

Dean watched him go, regret and sadness filling his heart.

A tear fell down his cheek as he watched the young kid he had always known step out into the world, thinking it was him against the world, and nothing could be said otherwise.

Whatever Sam decides, he would always be there for him, no matter what.

Nothing could stop him from looking after his little brother, no angels, damn demon bitches or anything.

No one would hurt him, because he was always on his side-even though it was hard to see sometimes.

_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
somewhere along in the bitterness  
and I would have stayed up with you all night  
had I known how to save a life_

**Thank you for reading; I hope you enjoyed this story**

**The song is 'How to Save A life' by The Fray.**

**I hope you enjoyed this story!**

**Please review, I would love to know your thoughts on it.**


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